Hello friend,
When I started freelancing, I was exhausted. I had just finished taking a full-time writing program and working full-time in a busy office. I was surrounded by people all the time and I was done with human interaction.
I just wanted to write and not be bothered with people.
While I am somewhat extroverted, I am also somewhat socially anxious. I’m always worried about the next thing I’ll say or do that will wind up being deeply embarrassing to me. So I avoid conversations with people I don’t know that well.
Unfortunately, most potential clients are people you don’t know that well to start off with. Also, most potential clients are human beings, so even as a freelancer, you have to deal with people once in a while.
I ran my business without meeting people face-to-face (either in person or over Zoom) for a long time. I kept most interactions to email or phone, where I felt less self-conscious.
Building ongoing relationships with clients over email is very difficult. It’s easy to forget there’s a human being behind the words on our screen. The phone allows for a bit more of a personal feeling because at least you hear someone’s voice, but visual contact (in person or virtually) is what builds trust and establishes connections.
Other issues with freelancing without meetings:
You don’t get a good feel for the other person and whether their words match their body language and microexpressions (these are usually what trigger red flags).
If you interact via email it can take a long time to get a concrete understanding of what they want and need—there’s a lot of back and forth as you clarify, which can be eliminated with one meeting. While an email may be faster to shoot off than a 15-minute meeting, in the meeting you get an answer to your question right away. With an email, you could be waiting days or even weeks.
If they don’t establish a relationship with you, it’s easier for them to put off paying you and even let you go.
Face-to-face, you have more opportunities to highlight your value, and make sure the client understands what you’ve done and how you contribute.
Meetings also give you an opportunity to collaborate on projects or eliminate confusion.
As you get to know the other person better through meetings, you can anticipate their needs and start making suggestions about future projects to work on together.
At the start of COVID-19, I began working with a business coach who advised me to take meetings for all of the above reasons. When I hesitated, she suggested practicing with low-stakes meetings at first.
My first meetings weren’t about selling anything or finding new business. They were just about me practicing asking questions so I could get to know the other person and talking about who I am and what I do.
Through practice, I’ve become much more comfortable with meetings, even if they still aren’t my favourite way to spend 30 minutes.
Here’s what I do:
For every short-term project, I include up to at least two meetings of between 30 and 60 minutes in the initial quote. That gives us a chance to get to know each other better, especially if the client is brand new. If I suspect we need more meetings, I’ll suggest it and I won’t charge the client for those meetings because they help me get my work done more quickly and efficiently. If the client requests additional meetings because they’re micro-managing or are changing their mind about the project, I’ll charge them for additional meetings.
For ongoing work, I include one free meeting each month to review my work, the results we’ve obtained, and where we want to go next.
This free meeting benefits me greatly:
It allows me to highlight my value and show them the results we’ve obtained, encouraging them to continue working with me.
It gives me an opportunity to anticipate their upcoming needs, which enables me to provide additional value or propose more work.
It reminds them of the human behind the work, which also fosters relationship building. It’s a lot harder to let go of someone you’ve met, like, and have a connection with.
This monthly meeting is as much for my benefit as it is for theirs.
So how do I implement this as someone who wasn’t always comfortable meeting new people (especially when I have to market myself)?
As my coach recommended, I started off with practice meetings. I reached out to people just to see if they’d be interested in meeting and discussing what we do. Initially, when people reached out to me I told myself it was just a meeting to get to know each other, rather than a meeting to sell my services.
I practiced asking questions. I focus more on getting to know them and their needs than on talking about myself and what I do. Then, when they ask questions about me I tailor my answers to what I’ve learned about them (honestly, of course).
I have a policy now where if someone reaches out to find out more about my work, I send them a link to my calendar and suggest we talk over Zoom. Having that as a policy means I force myself to do it and it’s now become automatic for me.
I take the friction out of the meeting process by using ScheduleOnce, which is a scheduling system that links to my calendar. Rather than emailing back and forth for hours (or days) about our schedules, they look at my calendar, see what’s available, and schedule a time that works for them. I block off certain days that are never available for meetings with potential clients, and certain times of day, so I’m never forced to have a meeting until my brain is running at full capacity.
When potential clients book a meeting with me they receive a form with questions about what their needs are, what their budget is, and whether they are the decision maker in their firm. This gives me a chance to do some research and prepare ideas ahead of the meeting, so I feel ready.
I also remind myself that there are very few people in the world who love meetings. Most people are as uncomfortable as I am and even if the meeting goes poorly, it’s just one meeting with one person that hasn’t gone well. There are still billions of other people out there who haven’t had that experience with me. One of them can become my client.
Questions to ask to get to know people:
What do you love about what you do?
Who are your favourite people to help?
Why did you start this business (or get into this career)?
What’s a result you obtained that you’re proud of?
The bonus is that if they do work with you, their answers to those questions could help you with your work.
So your challenge, if you’re up for it, is to push yourself to start taking meetings. It’s helped me greatly with my work and it can help you, too. Start small and with low stakes, but start as soon as possible. The more quickly you become comfortable with it, the easier it will be.
(Sorry because I know that’s often not what freelancers want to read, but you come here for what you need to read, not necessarily what you want to read.)
Here’s to your freelance success,
Heidi