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Helen Palmer's avatar

Great article Heidi. It has taken me decades to put in boundaries and I'm still working hard to keep them. So sorry to hear about your dog, sending condolences.

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Heidi Turner's avatar

Thank you, Helen. Boundaries can be so tough but I've never regretted holding a boundary.

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Anne Morgan's avatar

Really great reminders Heidi! And I'm so sorry to hear about your dog.

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Heidi Turner's avatar

Thanks Anne. It's been a hard couple of weeks--it's so strange working without him around nosing my elbow to get me to get away from the desk.

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Anne Morgan's avatar

I can imagine. My girl is almost 16 and I know that day is coming.

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Heidi Turner's avatar

One thing that helped me in the lead-up to it was reminding myself not to prolong the grief by anticipating it because that was preventing me from enjoying every precious second with him. I'd say it worked about 2/3 of the time. I definitely still had some anticipatory grief, but it helped me to really focus on the moments he was alive and with me, so I didn't miss out.

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Anne Morgan's avatar

That's really helpful. I've been finding my thoughts sliding that way and I know it isn't helping either of us. You put it really well. Thanks!

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Anne Morgan's avatar

Since you've been so supportive, I just wanted to let you know that we had to say goodbye to Violet yesterday.

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Heidi Turner's avatar

Oh Anne, I'm so sorry to hear that. They bring us so much joy and make our world a bit more magical, but we never get them for nearly as long as we want. I'm sending love and hugs.

Be gentle with yourself and feel what you need to feel. Know that you and Violet were lucky to have found so much love in your lives, and that love still has somewhere to go, even if you can't see the beautiful creature it's going to.

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Anne Morgan's avatar

Thank you Heidi

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